Stress

It feels like it has been forever since I have posted. I feel like I have written a zillion posts in my head, but nothing ever got written down over here where people actually read it.

I've been realizing lately that I've been putting a lot of pressure and stress on myself. How smart is that? Stressing yourself out? Not too smart, if I can say so.

I've found that my massive huge, long lists stress me out. I can still be a list lover, but I just have to not make them so long, and prioritize what I have on them.

I stress myself out by being around people who think negatively, because that makes me think negatively. Now, I'm not saying everyone has to be positive all the time, that is just not realistic. But I've noticed that some people are much more negative than others. In my online life, I've been removing them from Facebook, Twitter, etc. For me, it's a good choice.

I stress myself out by feeling like I have to accomplish EVERYTHING in a day. I don't give myself credit for what I have done, but focus on the failure. As Dr. Phil (I think it's him that says this) would say, "How's that working for you." Not very well, honestly. I've been working very hard to focus on the positive and leave the negative by the wayside.

I could go on and on about how I cause myself stress. I am learning to recognize what causes me to stress out and how to prevent it. For me, that is huge.

I have also learned that I have to remember to take care of ME. It's so hard to do, but it's so important. Starting today I'm going to take at least 30 minutes of alone time daily to just decompress and focus on myself. I don't know what all I will do during it, but I just know what I need it.

I also know that I need to get back to doing some of my CBT based stuff. Like Thought Records for instance. Those seriously helped me. I also need to continue with my exercise and eating healthy that seriously makes a word of difference. I can't forget my leisure time either. That is different than my alone time. I think I'm going to start using my leisure time to focus on creative projects. I miss doing those all the time.

I've learned so much over the last month and I know what skills/tasks I should be focusing on and doing, but at the same time it seems like so much work. I need my IOP friends back here with me. They would keep me on track. :)

Calling all Fashionistas!

I confess, I'm not a fashionista, by any means. More times than not I don't care what I look like when I go out as long as my hair is halfway decent. (I say halfway decent since I have naturally curly, frizzy hair that drives me nuts.) I do dress up a bit for work, sometimes dresses and skirts, but more often than not pants, because they are comfy. I don't wear much jewelry because I'm afraid I'm going to look like a fool when I wear it. Though I really like when others wear it, it just adds a finishing touch to an outfit.

Isn't that shoe lovely? It's Jimmy Choo's Griffin. It's only a mere $675. (I wish I could afford shoes that expensive!)

Anyway, I digress. What I need help with today is shoes. Now my husband would say that I have way too many shoes, but I truly don't. I have a love/hate relationship with shoes. I love cute shoes but have a hell of a time finding them in my size. My shoe size is about a 10 1/2 wide. Do you freaking know how hard it is to find a shoe in that size? Depending on the brand, I can wear a 10 or 11, but they have to be a wide.

The other day I was assisting in class, and noticed that this woman had beautiful black heels on. They looked amazing on her. I just loved them. They had about a 3 inch heel, shiny black, slightly pointed toes, very cute. She had on a very basic outfit, and these finished the look so to speak. That is what I need. Desperately.

My dilemma is first my shoe size, and second, in my jobs now, I need shoes that I can stand on for at least 4 hours. I'm on my feet a lot, running around in class. I need a comfy pair of high heels. Does such a thing exist? Or how do you survive wearing high-heeled shoes when you are your feet for extended periods of time? Any websites you can point me to? Or specific brands?

Help me fashionistas!!!! I desperately want cute, comfy, shoes that I can wear to work!