Tonight I had a break down. I don't know if I would call it a breakdown, but that is what I'm calling it. Tonight after work, I went and got my brows waxed and I paid, walked out the door with Jason, and felt tears start to well up. Jason asked where I wanted to eat, and I shrugged and said I don't care. Then I said, let's just go home, because otherwise I'm going to start crying. Then I lost it. The tears started to flow.
What bothers me is that I started to cry for no reason. I still can't figure out why I was crying. I have never done that before. In the past, little things have set me off, but never like this. This was full out crying, sobbing, runny nose and everything crying. I have always been able to hold back my emotions pretty good, not letting anyone know what I truly feel. Wearing a mask so to speak. When someone asks how I am, it's always good, or okay, even if I'm not feeling that way. I have a hard time letting others in, and letting them know how I truly feel. Anyway, back to what happened.
We got home, and I sat down at my computer, attempted to read at a site, and the tears started. Jason came over and gave me a hug. I finished looking through the tears, typed "taking a break" post on the board, and then logged off, went and sat on the couch to try to compose myself. Jason sat down next to me and put his arm around me. I told him not to, because I will cry harder/longer. He moved his arm away, and I started to cry even more. He took me in his arms, and I sobbed. I couldn't help it. Finally I got my tears to pretty much stop and composed myself.
It really bothers me that I don't know *why* I was crying in the first place and that I couldn't make the tears stop even though I wanted to. I don't like that. At all.
5 comments:
a change in hormones will make you cry.
an overdose of stress will make you cry.
It is a woman's perogative to cry at a moments notice and for absolutly no apparent reason and feel no need whatsoever to apologize or explain herself.
You can always cry on my shoulder. Although i'll cry with you!
That's an everyday occurrence with me, sorry you had to experience it. I know how scary it is when our emotions don't make sense. Laurie is right, it could be stress or hormonal stuff. If you continue to do that I would suggest you go to the doctor. But if it's just an occasional thing I wouldn't worry too much about it.
Jason, you keep being the good husband that you are!! You two are so perfect for each other!!
I've done this myself, although you never seen it because I would make myself busy mowing the lawn or weeding the garden....something to hide it. I think it's a female hormone/stress thing.....but still I'm concerned for you!! You hold to much in and need to say whats on your mind .... and I agree with Amy if you continue to do this visit with your Dr. soon!
Jason, your such a sweetheart!!
XOXO
Ma
(((Amber))) Laurie's right, it can be hormonal...we women are very complex human beings.
If it happens too often, though, I agree with Amy...don't hesitate to speak with your dr.
Now take care precious care of yourself, Amber! :)
Post a Comment